Kavalier Calm's Crowdsource Inspiration

I'm KC, The People's Bard. I write songs and poems inspired by the people I meet on the internet. Ask, and I’ll write something for you.
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  • Okay, speed writing done. Pretty funny song. Meshed the first four responses I saw together into one tune. Firstly it covers all of confused-outta-my-mind's bases: “love, music, free, fun”. I read pokeopa's “dinosaurs” and pengwenny's “traveling, maps, globes, suitcases” at the same time, and instantly thought of Jurassic Park. Like a crazy trip you'd take. But why? Then I read your-new-beginning's “faith in love again”, and I had my reason and my chorus. A couples retreat at Jurassic Park would be pretty effective I think. Thanks for playing along, bloggers; gems are created by pressure. I really appreciated the other responses, too, and may use them sometime soon. Enjoy everyone! — Kavalier Calm

         Couples Retreat at Jurassic Park

    We should have read the fine print
    when we signed up for that couples retreat.
    The ad said it would challenge us,
    but we didn’t know what that means.
    Well, we traveled by helo to the far side of the globe,
    an island not listed on any map.
    And we smiled as the pilot waved goodbye;
    we didn’t know we were in a trap.

    It wasn’t until we faced death
    that we found faith in our love again.

    We walked up to the resort house,
    but there was no one at the check in desk.
    In fact, there was no one in sight;
    and thus began our test.
    With one giant roar—ROAR,
    we turned our heads to the door.
    And much to my surprise and yours,
    in walked a dinosaur.

    I was so scared, I was glad
    I remembered to pack extra underwear.
    You grabbed my arm, and we screamed
    as we high-tailed it out of there.
    That dinosaur was in hot pursuit,
    and I knew if we kept running, he’d catch you.
    I screamed “Go on, I’ll distract him
    because only one of us can make it through.”

    But you refused to go on without me:
    "If one must go, then he gets both."
    And you grabbed my hand and kissed me,
    as that dino grew close.
    But when that T-Rex was mere feet away,
    he powered down like some robot.
    The retreat director stepped from the shadows
    and said, “Congrats you’re in love.”

    What do you think? Should I make this available for download?

    This tune is for the lovely Erin Catherine Dorothy. She said, “I’m looking to find freedom from the tiny confined town I live in.” I understand that feeling, Erin, and when you leave, I want to go with you. I’m not at home, so I could only record this with my laptop’s junky internal microphone…and a child-sized guitar I found with only three strings. Perfect. Enjoy, friends. — Kavalier Calm

         You Want To Live

    Well, you want out of this small town.
    You want to show everyone the world is round.
    Even if the edge is a cliff,
    you want to live.

    And I want to live with you.

    You think you were born at the wrong time.
    You dream of better decades as you sigh.
    Even if this age would be missed,
    you want to live.

    And I want to live with you.

    Did you know the Japanese word for love is ai? Thanks to Seba at rnortal for inspiring me to write this. Arigatō for listening, friends. Free downloads of this track are here (just enter $0 as the price). Much ai. — Kavalier Calm

         I Ai You

    You always say you wish you were Japanese
    ‘cause everyone in that country is lovely.
    But I beg of you don’t trade me
    for a life in the Far East.
    You want to eat oodles of udon,
    three times a day, but, babe,
    I hope you stay with me in this boring place
    ‘cause you are my favorite noodle.

    I know you want to leave on a one-way flight,
    and it may not stop you, but it might
    if you knew I ai you.

    You want friends who draw anime
    so you can point and say, “I really like your shading.”
    But I hope you choose to stick around
    ‘cause you’re the only thing I like to sketch in this town.

    I can’t compete with sushi and their wicked cool clothes,
    but I still want you to know…
    And I can’t build you a robot or a futuristic phone,
    but I still want you to know…
    I ai you.

    Submit a song request.


    I just finished creating a 2 in. x 2 in. book. It’s full of small poems originally written for this blog. I’m going to leave copies all over Washington, DC for strangers to find: in dusty bars, on the metro, under chocolate bars in convenience stores, etc. These little books are not meant to be kept; they are full of a love that travels. The first page reads: “This book is a free object with a will to travel. You can help it achieve its goal. After you read it, pass it on to a stranger or a friend.” Think of these little guys as one-time pills: you have a quick dose of love to pick you up, then you pass the pill on to another patient in need.

    I want these miniature tomes to travel outside of the DC area, too. If you are interested in helping the cause, email me at crowdsourceinspiration@gmail.com and: 1) tell me your address, and I’ll snail mail you some copies of the book or 2) I can email you the book template, and you can make copies yourself. Crafting 10 copies requires just 3 sheets of computer paper, printed double sided, and a bit of cutting, folding, and stapling. Whichever way you choose to help, I encourage you to take a photo of the books wherever you leave them to be found or in the hands of a stranger or a friend. Post the photos on your Tumblr, and I’ll reblog them with a special thanks to you. Thanks in advance for helping share the love—literally. — Kavalier Calm

    Me: You know how most people say they want to take the road less traveled?
    Girl at the bar: Yes.
    Me: Well, I just want to travel the road that takes me to you.