Kavalier Calm's Crowdsource Inspiration

I'm KC, The People's Bard. I write songs and poems inspired by the people I meet on the internet. Ask, and I’ll write something for you.
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  • Girl at the bar: So what do you do with your free time?
    Me: I like to play guitar and sing.
    Girl at the bar: Oh, one of those types. I bet you know every Dave Matthews song.
    Me: Actually, I don't know any Dave Matthews songs.
    Girl at the bar: So what do you play?
    Me: Mostly my own stuff.
    Girl at the bar: Ha! Suuuure. How many songs have you written?
    Me: I don't know. Several hundred.
    Girl at the bar: ...Oh. What do you write about?
    Me: Not girls like you. *take shot, walk away*

         Sing You To Sleep

    Baby, I know you’ve had a hard day,
    and I can’t make the pain go away.
    Just shut your eyes and weep,
    while I sing you to sleep.
    Ooo, better days will come.
    Ooo, dream sweetly, love.
    Ooo, shut your eyes and weep,
    while I sing you to sleep.

    Hannah asked me to write a tune for her girlfriend Savannah. I loved the sound of their names, so I obliged. In the second verse I subtly show that I’m proud of them for having a love that in our world, unfortunately, isn’t easy to have. Let’s all give these two brave girls a round of applause. Much love, all. — Kavalier

    I spend so much time trying to come up with sexy lyrics that my brain has become a softcore porno script.

    "P-E-R-F-E-C-T", for my perfectionist friend, Joel. Demand the best from the universe, friends, and you just might get it. Free downloads here. Much love. — Kavalier

    My blog turned 3 years old today. I’ve written almost 400 full-length songs in that time, mostly as gifts for strangers I’ve met through the internet.

    These have been the best 3 years of my life.

    I wrote an original Game of Thrones-themed song on request. Have a listen, friends.

    Wrote a song tonight that playfully discusses the heart-racing nature of love in very scientific terms. If you like what you hear, please subscribe to my channel. There’ll be much more, and if you send in a request, my next song might be for you! — Kavalier

         My Cardiac Muscle 

    You make my cardiac muscle pump blood through my vascular system really quickly. 
    I am so into you I’m panicking; I feel fragile and stickly. 
    I don’t know if I can handle all this oxygen in my hemoglobin. 
    I’m feeling high on endorphins; my neuropeptides are exploding, and I feel fine in their buzz. 
    But I’m afraid a crash is coming when my body can’t take anymore of your drug. 
    CHORUS

    A redditor requested I write a song about his favorite Pokémon, Chikorita. I asked why, and he said now that he’s grown up and working, he’s nostalgic for his days adventuring as a Pokémon trainer; Silver Version was his first love, and Chikorita was his starter Pokémon. I too miss immersing myself into my Gameboy, so I wrote this song for us both. If you like the track, please subscribe to my YouTube channel and feel free to message me song requests of your own. Also, you can download the song for free here. Much love. — Kavalier Calm, The People’s Bard 

    See, this is why I take song requests. I was about to go to bed, then some lovely anon dropped this on me, and I decided to write a song in less than 30 minutes (and took 26). And just like that, I may have a new favorite song. I need to add another verse and a solo, but the concept of this song is so beautiful. Sorry the recording is bad; I had to use my iPhone because I’m not near my 8-track. I think I’ll make a video of my playing this and post it next week. Thanks again for inspiring me, lonely girls. Much love. — Kavalier

         Lonely Girls

    This one goes out to the girl
    no one would write for,
    the girl who gets left behind
    before she leaves her door.
    The life of the muse
    just isn’t for them;
    they’ll never be the focus
    of an artist’s whim.
    But I know their pain;
    my life is the same.
    So I’m here to say:
    Lonely girls, this is my
    song for you.
    And I know
    it may not do,
    but never say never.
    Some prince is on his way.
    This song for you is proof
    that love awaits.

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