Posts tagged "Nintendo"

For awhile now, I’ve been trying to think of another Poke-themed song (“Ditto” was my first). Tonight I was reading the great poke-problems blog, and all I could think about was the HM problem in the games; it was always so lame to waste one of a quality Pokemon’s four precious move slots on an HM, but it was also annoying having some HM-only Pokemon and constantly having to switch them out at a Poke-center. And then it hit me; I could write a song using all of the wonderful HM/TM names in the lyrics! So, I decided to write a love song—about how nothing could keep me from my girl—and I used most of the First Gen HMs/TMs as lyrics. This was so fun to write because the move names are so diverse. For your edification, in the lyrics below I capitalized all the words referring to a Poke-move. The best part about this, is someone that knows zilch about Pokemon would just think it’s another love song. I devote this song to poke-problems, fypokemon, pokemon-mind-control, allpokemonallthetime, and all-that-is-pokemon—great blogs! Enjoy everyone! Free downloads of this song can be found here, and it can be found on YouTube here. If you like it, share it (Twitter, Facebook, etc.); and if you have an idea for another song, message me! — Kavalier Calm

     No Substitute

Baby, if you’re ever kidnapped;
I’ll do everything in my power to get you back.
Because you have no Substitute.

If you’re taken by a ninja,
I’ll do the Swords Dance with him;
give him my Rage, my Dragon Rage.
I’ll Body Slam, Skull Bash, and Seismic Toss him.

If a prince tries to woo you away
with his throne and his big Pay Day,
Swift as a Thunderbolt, I’ll be there to Counter
with my Strength. Yeah, I’ll beat him into Submission!

If a wizard grabs you and Teleports away,
I’ll Fly, Dig, and Surf over every piece of this earth,
until I find him. And when I do I’ll Reflect his Psychic spells
until his mind’s Softboiled and Toxic,
oh, until that Dream Eater is dead.

And, darling, if a dragon flies off with you,
I will hunt him down.
And our battle will be so epic,
it will shake the ground.
There’ll be Earthquakes, Fire Blasts,
Rock Slides, Explosions, and the sounds of Thunder.
And when he tries to Take me Down
I’ll give him a lethal Tri Attack:
Water Gun, Razor Wind, and Bubblebeam—
I’ll make a Blizzard out of him.

CHORUS


I wrote a song about being a plumber—based on the most famous plumber in the world: Mario. The lyrics are full of references to Super Mario Bros. Can you spot them all? This song is dedicated to these great Mario/Nintendo blogs: fuckyeahmario, fuckyeahsupermario, supermariobrothers, nerdwire, and thenintendard. Free downloads can be found here, and you can stream it on YouTube here. Enjoy everyone! — Kavalier

     The Plumber

It’s not always easy being a plumber; it’s not a job with a lot of glory;
but I know one thing: someone has to wield that plunger.
So, I wake up at dawn, put on my overalls, and grab my wrench.
Oh, duty calls in the Kingdom of Toilettes.

I start every day with my super brother; we get breakfast to power up.
We plot out the house calls and talk about our lives.
We’ve got blue-collar problems, but we know how to stomp and jump on them.
Oh, it’s just another day in the Kindom of Toilettes.

You wouldn’t believe the things I’ve seen in pipes:
mushrooms, turtle shells, and almost enough coins to buy a new life.
Crawling under sinks all day, I hit my head on question marks; and, man, sometimes I see stars.
Oh, it’s just another day in the Kindom of Toilettes.

It’s not always easy being a plumber; the pay sure ain’t great;
but I got a good lady, and that keeps my fighting the good fight.

I come home at night and my peach has dinner ready on the table;
I call her princess and tell her I like her pink dress,
and she says she loves her working man, and I tell her I love to provide for my lady.
Even if it means working in the Kingdom of Toilettes.

Even if by day’s end my mustache smells like mold and damp;
Even if I tire of moving that wrench from left to right—
each day I pay Mr. Bowser one more month’s rent.
I’m grateful for that job in the pipes.
Yes, it’s good to have a job in the Kingdom of Toilettes.


Tonight’s song is about a girl…or Pikachu? I focused on the classic character and Poke-language while I wrote the lyrics to this love song: “Electric Mouse”. I’ve italicized the lyrics where I’m specifically referencing Poke-lore or a moment in the show or video games. Some are obvious, and others are subtle; do you understand them all, true fans? I’m devoting this song to some of my favorite Poke-blogs, which everyone should check out: pikachusblog, f***-yeahpokemon, pkmnblue, pokemonforever-, pokemonftwlulz, allpokemonallthetime, pokemonpalooza, all-that-is-pokemon, and nerdchallenge. If you like this tune, check out my other Poke-songs on our Popular Songs page. Free downloads of this song are here, and you can stream it on YouTube here. Thanks for listening! — Kavalier Calm

     Electric Mouse

Your lightning bolt-looks and swift wit
have a special power over me.
When you blush, sparks fly
from the red on your cheeks.

Electric mouse, I choose you. Won’t you choose me?
Electric mouse, I choose you. You’re all I need.

You refuse to live in a bubble;
you’re strong and want to stand on your own.
Well, I ain’t asking you to evolve;
I just don’t want to stand alone.
Even the toughest sometimes need a hand
to fight off Spearow.
CHORUS

I bet those other cats—them Meowth
promise to fly you away in a Team Rocketship.
But I’ll stand right here on the ground
and work to grant your every wish.
Let’s train to fight and and train to love;
I know we’ll be the best there ever was.
CHORUS


I’ve had a number of how questions in my inbox about songwriting lately, so I’ve decided to blog more about #the process and not just post the product. I really want to build a community of listeners and contributors—truly crowdsource inspiration—and maybe blogging more frequently, about the small details of the craft, will encourage a dialogue and give me more fuel.
Someone asked me how I write my lyrics, so I took a picture of the notebook I’ve been spilling ink on lately. I always write by hand first, and as you can see by the image, it’s chaotic and sloppy. This page began as a song for Princess Zelda, and then my mind took a sharp turn to Princess Peach. Why? Well, when researching Zelda, I read that famous quote in brackets—about storm clouds over Hyrule—and I was thinking about how Zelda wants to protect her people from the coming storm, as if under an umbrella. I fell in love with this concept—and with the opportunity to subtly parody Rihanna—but realized Zelda doesn’t really carry an umbrella. But Princess Peach does. This is still a work in process, but later this week, I plan to post a song about how Peach wants to return the favor to Mario—for all those times he’s saved her—by giving him shelter under her parasol. Of course, this is my plan right now; maybe my brain will take another sharp turn. You can also see that I have a lot of single words. When doing my research I write down a lot of images/references that I want to include. In the second stage, I will turn these single words into whole (potentially rhyming) phrases. Maybe I’ll take a picture of that, too.
Now my questioner was probably asking about how I write less literally. I’ll say that there’s a certain artistic, passionate side to it that can’t be explained. I don’t know why some days I have to write. I don’t know why some nights I wake up with an idea and can’t go back to sleep until I write it down. That’s magic to me, still, and I am happy with it remaining so. If you are an artist and want to cast spells like that, too, all I can do is encourage bravery and effort. You have to be brave that your work is worthy of sharing and know that every time you share, you will learn something, and be a better sharer the next time. Effort is about actually doing it. I’ve known too many writers (myself included) that spend more time talking about writing than actually writing. Effort means you have to do it every day. I mean every day. The only way to create gems is by sorting them from the rough. I write so much garbage, but I just steamroll through it, believing that the next line could be gold. It’s a probability thing. You can’t know if the next line you write or the 3000th will be truly good, so you just have to keep writing; the more you write, the more you increase your probability of winning. I give myself short, very serious deadlines to ensure my probability stays high. Of course, I share some of my weaker work on this blog; plenty of times I’ve swung, feeling like a hit a home run with you all, only to strike out. There’s only one way to respond to that, though: keep writing. And I will keep writing because I’ve hit enough homers to be thirsty for more. I don’t really want to let the Tumblrverse down with laziness or self-doubt.
So, friends, do you have any other questions about the process?

I’ve had a number of how questions in my inbox about songwriting lately, so I’ve decided to blog more about #the process and not just post the product. I really want to build a community of listeners and contributors—truly crowdsource inspiration—and maybe blogging more frequently, about the small details of the craft, will encourage a dialogue and give me more fuel.

Someone asked me how I write my lyrics, so I took a picture of the notebook I’ve been spilling ink on lately. I always write by hand first, and as you can see by the image, it’s chaotic and sloppy. This page began as a song for Princess Zelda, and then my mind took a sharp turn to Princess Peach. Why? Well, when researching Zelda, I read that famous quote in brackets—about storm clouds over Hyrule—and I was thinking about how Zelda wants to protect her people from the coming storm, as if under an umbrella. I fell in love with this concept—and with the opportunity to subtly parody Rihanna—but realized Zelda doesn’t really carry an umbrella. But Princess Peach does. This is still a work in process, but later this week, I plan to post a song about how Peach wants to return the favor to Mario—for all those times he’s saved her—by giving him shelter under her parasol. Of course, this is my plan right now; maybe my brain will take another sharp turn. You can also see that I have a lot of single words. When doing my research I write down a lot of images/references that I want to include. In the second stage, I will turn these single words into whole (potentially rhyming) phrases. Maybe I’ll take a picture of that, too.

Now my questioner was probably asking about how I write less literally. I’ll say that there’s a certain artistic, passionate side to it that can’t be explained. I don’t know why some days I have to write. I don’t know why some nights I wake up with an idea and can’t go back to sleep until I write it down. That’s magic to me, still, and I am happy with it remaining so. If you are an artist and want to cast spells like that, too, all I can do is encourage bravery and effort. You have to be brave that your work is worthy of sharing and know that every time you share, you will learn something, and be a better sharer the next time. Effort is about actually doing it. I’ve known too many writers (myself included) that spend more time talking about writing than actually writing. Effort means you have to do it every day. I mean every day. The only way to create gems is by sorting them from the rough. I write so much garbage, but I just steamroll through it, believing that the next line could be gold. It’s a probability thing. You can’t know if the next line you write or the 3000th will be truly good, so you just have to keep writing; the more you write, the more you increase your probability of winning. I give myself short, very serious deadlines to ensure my probability stays high. Of course, I share some of my weaker work on this blog; plenty of times I’ve swung, feeling like a hit a home run with you all, only to strike out. There’s only one way to respond to that, though: keep writing. And I will keep writing because I’ve hit enough homers to be thirsty for more. I don’t really want to let the Tumblrverse down with laziness or self-doubt.

So, friends, do you have any other questions about the process?


Princess Peach wrote a song for Mario! After decades of sheepishly acting on her love, the perennial damsel in distress is finally telling Mario how it is. Mario fans will appreciate the lyrical references (some of which are obscure) to the many games in the Mario franchise. This is some of my happiest work ever, and I hope it makes you listeners smile. I dedicate this song to these awesome blogs with Peach/Mario/Nintendo content: themushroomprincess, peachtoadstool, thenobleredplumber, suppermariobroth, game-portal, smashbrotherhood, n64wasmychildhood, dotcore, and nintendard.

Free downloads of this song are here, and you can stream it on YouTube here. — Kavalier Calm

      Under Peach’s Umbrella

I do all I can to impress you.
I race karts and win the Grand Prix.
I formed the Peach Hit Five,
so you could hear me sing.
I’ve been to all nine of your parties,
and I know how to lace up a pair of cleats.
I play every sport
hoping you’re on my team.

I just want you under my umbrella,
I just want you under here with me.
I just want you under my umbrella,
so I can kiss you on the cheek.

You’ve saved me from the Koopa Troop
more times than I can count.
You’re my hero,
there is no doubt.
You’ve been across the galaxy and back,
and you’ve been stretched paper thin.
I send 1-up love letters
to help you win.
CHORUS

I know how to float and fight in a brawl;
A melee is nothing Toad and I can’t handle.
But I let that lizard Bowser lay his hands on me
‘cause it’s the only way you’ll see my need.
Well, I’m tired of playing coy—
listen to me, boy:
don’t wait ‘til I’m kidnapped
to rescue me!
CHORUS


My newest #gaming song is for all the earthbound dreamers out there. We all want to get off the ground, live our dreams and go on adventures, but sometimes it feels like we’ll be earthbound forever. I bet that’s what Ness thought, living a normal life just like the rest of us, until a meteor fell and an alien told him he was destined to save the universe. My song is about Ness and Earthbound/Mother, but it’s for anyone hoping adventure is just around the bend. Because, who knows, it may be! My friends Eric and Josh over at the wonderful On The Level Gaming blog suggested I write a song for Ness, so I dedicate this song to them. They actually gave me several awesome #gaming song ideas, so expect more soon. I also dedicate this song to these great blogs with Earthbound/Mother content: earthbound-mother-series, asknesssdad, ask-ninten, doodlebound, imadogfish, simonbobx, pepperattacks, and f***yeahmother. Free downloads of this song are here, and you can stream it on YouTube here. Enjoy, earthbound dreamers! — Kavalier Calm

     Earthbound

If you’re an earthbound boy hoping for heroic fate,
know that it’s just one meteor fall away.
And when you get your chance to defend those in need,
you better have your baseball bat at the ready.

‘Cause an insectoid alien from the future may appear,
buzz, buzz, buzzing his worries in your ear;
he’ll tell you the Apple of Enlightenment
chose you to save the universe from space giants.
And you’ll know that prophetic fruit spoke the truth
when your psychic mind knows just what to do.
CHORUS

‘Cause you may have to fight Starmen and Spiteful Crows
while wielding weapons like frying pans and yo-yos.
And you may travel through one, two, three, four towns,
and you may get to see The Runaway Five get down.
And I bet you’ll meet a bunch of insane cultists
who think their way of life is the Happiest.
CHORUS

And you won’t fight alone; you’ll have all the friends you need:
a Prince, your dog, a nerd, and a lovely lady.
You can call your dad whenever you need to save,
and at Mr. Saturn’s hotel you may get a free stay.
And when you feel the weight of the world on you,
remember faith in your friends and prayer will see you through.

We earthbound boys all have big dreams.
We want to leave our homes and leave our dull destinies.
The best we can do is be vigilant and stand
ready for when the universe needs a helping hand.
Earthbound boys, remember your heroic fate
is just one meteor fall away.


I first got the idea to write a song for Princess Zelda from Meagan Marie, who gave me a list of strong female #gaming characters worthy of devotion (I wrote a song for Lara Croft first). When I was reading the reception section of Zelda’s wiki, I saw that one publication critically called her an “iconically passive female trophy”. I don’t buy this idea one bit. Sure, we rarely get to control her as players, which makes our relationship with her inherently passive; but I don’t think needing Link’s help makes her passive. A good leader knows when she needs help and isn’t afraid to ask for it. In my estimation, Zelda is constantly sacrificing for the people of Hyrule. She deals with threats to her kingdom, generation after generation, with intelligence and humility. I see a strong, independent woman. Why else would the romance between she and Link still be ambiguous after all these years? She doesn’t need a man. It’s just that sometimes, when she’s in a scrap, she needs a hero.

As with my other #gaming songs, I aimed to write lyrics full of subtle references to games and characters, while remaining generic enough to be engaging for non-gamers. This song is about a princess (Zelda) who is against the arranged marriage set up for her with a bad man (Ganondorf); so she sings about the man of her prophetic dreams (Link), a man who will help her defend her kingdom without trying to control it or her. Fans of the Legend of Zelda series will appreciate the opening guitar riff and the many lyrical references to the games. Strong women will appreciate the sentiment of trying to find a good man who isn’t controlling.

I devote this song to Meagan Marie for the initial request, and to these blogs with awesome Legend of Zelda content: simply-zelda, zeldagrove, f***yeahlink, f***yeahhyrule, sexandzelda, linksinflatedego, triforceofawesome, legendofzeldaseries, and f***yeahprincesszelda. Thank you, bloggers; your content was instrumental (pun intended) in my songwriting! This song is available for free download here (just put 0 as purchase price), and you can stream it/comment on YouTube here. Enjoy, friends! And if you do, please share my work with others. — Kavalier Calm

     Missing Link

I don’t want to wed the King of Evil,
no matter how big his dowry is.
I don’t need the Triforce of Wisdom
to know he grants a Death wish.
Dark clouds billow over me as I dream;
and I’m waiting for the sun, for my man in green.
He won’t want to rule over me or my people;
no, he’ll be our chain mail’s missing link.

I don’t know why I have to marry that boar;
father knows I love to wield the Master Sword.
Maybe I’ll hide as a shiek in some far off land,
so I don’t have to take that man’s hand.
And I can hear my hero’s music, his ocarina of time,
and I can see his blonde hair when I close my eyes.
He won’t want to rule over me or my people;
no, he’ll be our chain mail’s missing link.

Now I might be a Twilight Princess, but that don’t mean I’m weak.
I just need a hero like every queen before me.
Oh, we can’t let our world turn dark.
We need a hero to bring us a spark.

And I can feel him, our hope, I know he’s near.
And he’ll help us fight off all of our fears.
He won’t want to rule over me or my people;
no, he’ll be our chain mail’s missing link.


Coming in close second to our fear of a zombie apocalypse, we gamers and sci-fi geeks seem to think that a robot takeover is the most imminent threat to mankind. This is a theme in countless video games and films. Tonight’s song about Mega Man gives the classic, heroic robot’s perspective on that likelihood. I included many references to the Mega Man series, and I challenge fans to spot them all. I for one always find it fascinating that we assume robots (or aliens for that matter) would choose to kill us; I like to think the default mode for other sentient beings is peace. If a robot chose to make war, I would first question the heart of its programmer before I questioned its motives. I devote this song to the fine folks at On The Level Gaming for putting in another stellar request; Josh suggested “a song about Mega Man, how he’s no different than a lamp or vacuum, a machine that’s built for killing other robots and will never change.” I met that request and added a pinch of pity and a slab of philosophy. I also devote this song to these awesome blogs with Mega Man content: fyeahmegaman, acoolmegamanblog, fyeahrockman, acid-eater, ask-badboxartmegaman, its-x-excel, and nintendosuicide. Thank you, bloggers; your content was a true inspiration. Free downloads of this song are here, and you can stream it/like it on YouTube here. And if you enjoy this, please check out my other #gaming work and put in a request of your own. — Kavalier Calm

     Robotic Dreams

I’m not Mega, and I’m not a Man;
I’m more like a vacuum or a lamp.
I’m just a machine that’s built for killing
my own kind without regret.

But like any soldier, I wonder what all the murder is for.
Why do me and my robot brothers wage your war?
This is a draft I cannot dodge;
you programmed me, you, with all of your flaws.
So, I’ll keep fighting for everlasting peace.

Dr. Light, you told me that mad scientist Wily (Wahwee!)
brainwashed my brother Blues;
Now I fight him and the other robot masters
with my Mega Blaster and their own moves.
CHORUS
So, I’ll keep fighting for everlasting peace,
though I want the fighting to cease.

And I dream of electric sheep,
a day when robots will be friends, not weapons.
We wish we’d been programmed to love;
but we are only as good as those who made us.

2,209 plays

Help me write a song, Pokemon fans!

I want to write another song for the Poke-community, but I’m having trouble thinking of a central idea. I’m hoping some of you can inspire me by answering this post. Which Pokemon is your favorite and why? What’s your favorite moment in the games or anime? You can also just share random Poke-words you think would be fun in lyrics. To get a sense of how I work, you can listen to my first three Pokemon songs here; one was about using a Ditto to get the girl of my dreams, the other was a love song based on HMs/TMs, and the most-recent one was about a girl…or Pikachu? Thanks in advance for your input! I’ll devote this song to any bloggers whose ideas I use. — K.C.


My newest #Pokemon song is about Team Rocket. I tried to write a song from their perspective, and in doing so, I realized that the Poke-crime syndicate may not be as evil as it seems. After all, many of us go to extremes to acquire wealth. And we all exploit the world’s natural resources for our own good—be it for electricity or medical testing. So are we really any better than the members of Team Rocket? I accidentally got very political pointing out the flaws in our criticisms; all the election buzz must be having an effect on me. I dedicate this song to aprilrose19 because she first suggested that I write a song about Team Rocket. I also dedicate this song to these blogs I’ve found recently with rad, relevant Poke-content: f***yeahpokevillains, f***yeahjessieandjames, fyteamrocket, rarecandytreatment, fypblog, and diglettcave. Free downloads of this track are here, and you can stream it on YouTube here. If you dig my work, please share it with your friends through Facebook/Twitter/etc., and check out my other work! Thanks for listening, friends! — Kavalier Calm

     Team Rocket

All you trainers, would-be masters, think us evil
‘cause we steal and exploit Pokémon for profit.
But all Pokémon exist for the glory of Team Rocket.
We are all just like Meowth, waiting for a Pay Day.
Some go to Game Corner and play the slots; we steal our way.
It’s hard to make a living, and that’s why we say:

To protect the world from devastation!
To unite all peoples within our nation!
To denounce the evils of truth and love!
To extend our reach to the stars above!
We must steal every one!

All of you are so Pokémon rich, you have more than you can carry;
Giovanni wants to spread the wealth rotting on your PC!
Robin Hood proved it’s okay to be a thief.
You all act high and mighty, but we know the ruse:
you love power, energy, and fossil fuel.
Pokémon are just a resource for us to use.
CHORUS

Animal experiments are fine if you profit from their finds.
You don’t care that your acne cream was tested on chimps and mice;
so why pretend you’re sad when we test on an electric-type?
If you are all so disgusted by what we do,
then tell me why everyone wants to catch Mewtwo?
We aren’t fooled. We know the truth:
CHORUS

Poke-fans, can you spot all the Poke-references?

8,720 plays

If you had a Pokemon in real life…?

It’s due time I write another Pokemon song, but I need you all to help me come up with good lyric ideas. I was thinking it would be fun if you answered this question: If you had a Pokemon in real life, how would you use it to make your life better? For example, if I had a Jigglypuff, I’d ask it to sing high notes on my recordings. Or if I had a Pikachu, I’d ask it to supply the power to my house. What are your ideas? — Kavalier


I often daydream about having Pokémon. This would be embarrassing, except I know many people reading this wish for the same thing. I don’t wish I lived in the Poké-universe, though. I want to train and use Pokémon in our world. I wrote a song about this desire—imagining what it would be like to have a bunch of Pokémon and all the good things we would do for people in need. This song could have been an hour-long epic because every Pokémon has a practical use; so, I just constrained the lyrics to some of my favorites and some of yours. I devote this tune to those of you who told me how you would use a Pokémon in real life, and to my favorite blogs with inspiring Poké-content: gottacatchemall, reblogallpokemon, pokemonpalooza, pokemon-personalities, fypblog, and thenintendard. Free downloads of this song are available here (just enter $0 as the price), and you can stream it/like it on YouTube here. Enjoy, friends! — Kavalier Calm

     Poké-friends (Call On Us)

My poké-friends and I help who we choose:
needy souls who need a poké-move
to better their fortune and better their luck.
Yes, those in need call on us.

I train Arcanine for the blind,
and my Squirtle helps fight fires,
and my Charmander starts them when the power’s out.
My Tropius and I visit hungry children;
they feast on his fruit, and their spirits soar
when he gives them rides up among the clouds.

They know that we care.
They know we do all we can.
CHORUS

I lend Chansey to doctors to heal the sick,
and my Snorlax teaches sleep to insomniacs,
and my Diglett digs foundations for new schools.
I send Blaziken to artist colonies,
and he inspires them with his martial art.
His fire burns away their writer’s block.
BRIDGE
CHORUS

4,083 plays

I’m reblogging my song about the SNES classic Earthbound as a part of a shoutout to Caitlin and her very fun #gaming blog at cipater.net. I asked Caitlin if I could write a song for her, and she modestly told me about her love of gin, horror movies, and Earthbound (…sounds like the perfect woman to me). I’m still contemplating how to turn gin and horror movies into a song, but in the interim I want to dedicate my Earthbound tune to Caitlin. I have a feeling she’s ready to go on an adventure just like I am. And it’s good to be prepared; Ness taught all of us that our heroic fate is just one meteor fall away. Do yourself a favor and check out Caitlin’s blog. And enjoy the song, friends. Free downloads of it are here, and you can stream it on YouTube here. — KC

     Earthbound

If you’re an earthbound boy hoping for heroic fate,
know that it’s just one meteor fall away.
And when you get your chance to defend those in need,
you better have your baseball bat at the ready.

‘Cause an insectoid alien from the future may appear,
buzz, buzz, buzzing his worries in your ear;
he’ll tell you the Apple of Enlightenment
chose you to save the universe from space giants.
And you’ll know that prophetic fruit spoke the truth
when your psychic mind knows just what to do.
CHORUS

‘Cause you may have to fight Starmen and Spiteful Crows
while wielding weapons like frying pans and yo-yos.
And you may travel through one, two, three, four towns,
and you may get to see The Runaway Five get down.
And I bet you’ll meet a bunch of insane cultists
who think their way of life is the Happiest.
CHORUS

And you won’t fight alone; you’ll have all the friends you need:
a Prince, your dog, a nerd, and a lovely lady.
You can call your dad whenever you need to save,
and at Mr. Saturn’s hotel you may get a free stay.
And when you feel the weight of the world on you,
remember faith in your friends and prayer will see you through.

We earthbound boys all have big dreams.
We want to leave our homes and leave our dull destinies.
The best we can do is be vigilant and stand
ready for when the universe needs a helping hand.
Earthbound boys, remember your heroic fate
is just one meteor fall away.


I’m dedicating tonight’s song to the beautiful Lena and her awesome blog pokemon-zelda-ghibli. She said she favors the original 150 Pokemon, and so do I. I focused on the classic character Pikachu and Poke-language while I wrote the lyrics to this love song. I’ve italicized the lyrics where I reference Poke-lore. Some references are obvious, and others are subtle; do you understand them all, Poke-fans? Free downloads are here (just enter $0 as price). — Kavalier Calm

Electric Mouse

Your lightning bolt-looks and swift wit
have a special power over me.
When you blush, sparks fly
from the red on your cheeks.

Electric mouse, I choose you. Won’t you choose me?
Electric mouse, I choose you. You’re all I need.

You refuse to live in a bubble;
you’re strong and want to stand on your own.
Well, I ain’t asking you to evolve;
I just don’t want to stand alone.
Even the toughest sometimes need a hand
to fight off Spearow.
CHORUS

I bet those other cats—them Meowth
promise to fly you away in a Team Rocketship.
But I’ll stand right here on the ground
and work to grant your every wish.
Let’s train to fight and and train to love;
I know we’ll be the best there ever was.
CHORUS


Tonight’s post features a song I wrote for all the Legend of Zelda fans out there. As with my other #gaming songs, I aimed to write lyrics full of subtle references to games and characters, while remaining generic enough to be engaging for non-gamers. This song is about a princess (Zelda) who is against the arranged marriage set up for her with a bad man (Ganondorf); so she sings about the man of her prophetic dreams (Link), a man who will help her defend her kingdom without trying to control it or her. Fans of the games will appreciate the opening guitar riff and the many lyrical references to the games. Strong women will appreciate the sentiment of trying to find a good man who isn’t controlling. I’m devoting this post to the bloggers at f***yeahzeldahumor, zeldaobsessed, zelda-remixes, simplyzelda, and blueshellentertainment. Check out those blogs if you want to see some rad Zelda content. This song is available for free download here (just enter $0 as purchase price), and you can stream it/comment on YouTube here. Enjoy, everybody! — Kavalier Calm

     Missing Link

I don’t want to wed the King of Evil,
no matter how big his dowry is.
I don’t need the Triforce of Wisdom
to know he grants a Death wish.
Dark clouds billow over me as I dream;
and I’m waiting for the sun, for my man in green.
He won’t want to rule over me or my people;
no, he’ll be our chain mail’s missing link.

I don’t know why I have to marry that boar;
father knows I love to wield the Master Sword.
Maybe I’ll hide as a shiek in some far off land,
so I don’t have to take that man’s hand.
And I can hear my hero’s music, his ocarina of time,
and I can see his blonde hair when I close my eyes.
He won’t want to rule over me or my people;
no, he’ll be our chain mail’s missing link.

Now I might be a Twilight Princess, but that don’t mean I’m weak.
I just need a hero like every queen before me.
Oh, we can’t let our world turn dark.
We need a hero to bring us a spark.

And I can feel him, our hope, I know he’s near.
And he’ll help us fight off all of our fears.
He won’t want to rule over me or my people;
no, he’ll be our chain mail’s missing link.

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