The red ring of death. This song is for anyone who’s experienced this tragedy. I was crushed the first time it happened to me; sure, it’s not too difficult to get a new Xbox 360, but I built a relationship with that specific piece of hardware. I was sad to retire it. This song could be about a lover; but Xbox players will enjoy the metaphors. For listeners who don’t intuitively recognize subtle emotional satire, this is a joke—just like the emotional intensity in my zombie apocalypse love song. I hope everyone enjoys it; I’m slowly rounding out my album of songs for gamers, geeks, and other nerds. I dedicate this tune to these awesome Xbox/gaming blogs; I’ll bet these bloggers understand the sadness in this song: girlsonxbox, x-360, brogamer, geeksngamers, pwnlove, gamefreaks, and dotcore. Free downloads of this song are available here, and you can listen to it on YouTube here. — Kavalier
The Red Ring of Death
You used to respond when I pushed your buttons;
you’d hum and get hot,
and we’d play for hours, on the bed, on the couch,
from dusk ‘til dawn.
We’ve been on an adventure or two:
Angel, I rode your Halo through space;
and we lived a fairytale, a Fable;
you were my Lady Grey.
But all at once, you put up a wall:
a red ring of silence—the death of our love.
And I thought we could save the world;
in fact, we did a dozen times.
But now you won’t respond to me;
who will stop the Locust Horde?
You committed Grand Theft—
Auto-matically stealing my heart—
when you went cold to my touch;
oh, you can’t refurbish such hurt.
Now I’m heartless and homeless,
looking for a new box to settle in.
I’ll trade in your memories, pawn all your stuff,
and find love again.